About Grief
The thing about grief is, the only way over it is through it. We all will face grief in our lives, on more than one occasion. It's the nature of this world where our enemy is active and we await the return of our King. I'm no expert, but I'm currently grieving a loss and have been seeking God's heart during my journey. There's a few things He wants us to know. Grief is not only for death Any type of loss can and should be grieved. A job change, a new house, a new season of life. People, pets, and places. All of these involve loss, and while our greatest and most difficult season of grief will be when a loved one dies, these other changes also require us to go through the grieving process. Some life changes bring death to an old season while the new one is birthed. Even when something good and beautiful is happening, you might be losing something else. You grieve your single life when you get married. You grieve your childhood home when you move out on your own. It's ok to acknowledge the loss before celebrating what's new.
Grief requires community Walking through these times of grief alone is a recipe for disaster. No one is strong enough to handle all the brokenness that this world brings, and it's one of the reasons God made us to be relational creatures. His word tells us to mourn with those who mourn, and that requires the mourner to let others in. Go to the people who love you and let them show you compassion. Have grace for those who say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, or ask too much or too little of you. When someone you love is grieving, be there. Be available, be present, be merciful. Even if you don't know what to say or do - be there. Let them express everything they're feeling, and help whenever you can in practical ways.
Trust God with your pain There is nothing you can feel, think, or express that will surprise God. He knows what you're going through, His compassion is for you, and He knows what's ahead of you. He experienced every grief, every pain, every sickness when He took our place on the cross. Talk to Him, write to Him, sing to Him, and then listen. He wants to speak.
Grief takes time The length of time you need to grieve is one of those things we don't get to know in advance. God's not big on sharing his timetable with us, as much as we would like Him to! We can trust His comfort as much as we can trust His timing. You cannot hurry grief, you cannot cheat it. There is no extra credit for turning it in early. Take all the time you need to walk through it. We tend to either put it off or wallow in it way too long, getting stuck until it becomes part of our identity. Keep walking and trust God to lead you.
Blessed are those who mourn... what a verse! Those are Jesus' words to you as you grieve. Can you receive them? Beloved, you are blessed because you will be comforted (Mt 5:4). He is the greatest comforter, and He is faithful. He's already promised it, it's in the Bible, there's no doubt about it. Let Him be your comfort, and He will one day bring comfort to others through you.
